It's Mothers Day today, I had planned to be in Prince George visiting my mom, and Dylan's mom but alas, I live in a land of eternal hell so I was unable to go.
Turns out that was for the best because not only have I rattled some important things loose on my car with all the dirt road driving I do now. It has been raining for three days. Not a happy springtime sprinkle, but a brutal massive flooding type rain. Our road is washed out in two spots the creeks near us our totally flooded. People near us have had to go pull their cows and calves out from the creeks and over flowing dugouts on their property.
I mentioned previously how my chickens are mean to each other, they have not improved. I have improvised a short term solution. Part of which involved me building a secondary chicken coop. which needed to be done before my chickens drowned in the rain. I planned to do it myself because I am an independent lady.
I pride myself on being able to do most things on my own. My mother and grandmother taught me pretty early on how to use tools and I like to consider myself relatively handy. Dylan is a carpenter so since I've been with him he does all the handiwork. Not because I'm incapable, but because I am incapable of doing things that are up to his standards. Fair enough. The chicken coop I figured would be fine for me to do on my own seeing as I was making it out of all the garbage lumber that was discovered beneath the snow on our property. So I got to work.
Task #1 9:00am
Locate the tools I would need.
I could not find the tools I needed so I found a hand saw, a hammer and nails, and that's it. I had also found a drill and screws, but I couldn't get the drill to work and Dylan always tells me not to break his tools, so I was afraid to keep screwing around (pun intended) with it in case I ruined it.
Task #2 9:15am
Gather up the garbage/"material"
This involved me ripping pieces off of a
tree house, pulling things out of dirty mud holes covered in slugs. My life is so glamourous.
Task #3 10:00am
Get to building
Things were far more difficult than I anticipated, if only I had found a drill I knew how to use and some screws. I hammered and nailed until my little arms felt like jello. I sawed materials until I truly believed my back was going to just break off. But I got it finished. It looks like garbage, because it's made from garbage, but it does the job. Keeps the chickens out of the weather, and gives them a place to lay their eggs. I start to walk to the house and I realize that my little legs can barely even move. I'm not sure when I was this physically exhausted before. It's a small coop, three nesting boxes. Its just big enough for me to give the six mean chickens a place to go.
I'm trying to walk back to the house, willing myself to start dinner so it's ready when Dyl gets home, I assume it's about 3:00pm.
I'm sitting down on the porch when Dylan drives up. This means it's actually 7:00pm. WHICH MEANS IT TOOK ME NINE HOURS TO BUILD A TINY COOP OUT OF GARBAGE. He looks concerned because I look exactly as good as I feel, I tell him about my coop. He is a good man, so he says, "I saw it, it looks good." We both know he's lying. I tell him about how tired I am after using the handsaw to cut all the material. He is not sympathetic. The worst part about him being with a carpenter is that he does that kind of thing all day every day so when I have to do it one day and whine to him, he hasn't a shred of sympathy to throw my way. We go in the house together where he can see immediately what tools I've used. He's not even through the door and he starts laughing.
"OH MY GOD, RACHEL, I'M SO SORRY. I FEEL SO BAD FOR YOU." He yells through his laughter.
I'm beginning to feel vindicated.
"THAT IS NOT A SAW FOR WOOD! Thats a hack saw, it's meant to cut through small pieces of metal, plastic etc. I used it for pvc pipes. It's barely got any teeth on it. You seriously cut every piece of material with this? HOW?!"
I feel less vindicated, much more embarrassed. But alas, the coop is done and my mean old granny hens have a place to lay their terribly infrequent eggs and stay warm.
They don't use it. They lay their eggs in it, not in the nesting boxes, just on the ground in it. They stayed outside during the apocalypse rain. I worked so hard to build it for them and they'd rather stand outside looking like drowned rats. I thought maybe they didn't like it, so I set up tarps for them to go under to get out of the rain. They didn't like that either. I've now given them four different options to get out of the rain, they choose none of them. They are terribly ungrateful.
Just like Rocky, he's an ungrateful little mutt too. This is the third mothers day that has passed and once again, he has not given me a card. Just a little bit of drool on my pants. He's very generous with his drool. I love him despite this.
Happy Mothers day to my mom, who taught me how to use tools, but apparently left some learning for me to do on my own. Happy Mothers day to all of the incredible women that have shaped me into the hot mess of a farmer I am today. I've been fortunate to have had a village of strong and intelligent women guide and support me through my life.
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